+ i hope to let you go +

the reality
vs.
the fantasy
of you
is always so much less endearing.

that curve of your jaw;
how your chin is
split,
begging my tongue
to lick
its coarseness.

-- like your heart --
-- like your black, hard, soulless heart --

can't imagine
those lips you give me
are pressed on
anyone else
the way they're
pressed
onto me.

and i'll never be your choice.

so stay safe, horrid one.
stay calm and sweet
and
lie
lie
lie
to every person you encounter.
to every place you travel to.
to each cup of bitter coffee,
scalding down your throat.

to the ONE
who gets that
diamond
that you felt the need
to tell me
about.

i should've slapped your cheek
instead of
letting you
cup my face,
your fingers messing my tresses.
instead of
letting you
taste me
the very
instant
you found me
alone.

i hope
to let you go
completely
some day.
but,
for now,
all i have is
hope.